ay？ Carlisle asked。 No； no！ she said quickly； swinging her legs over the side of the mattress and sliding down till her feet were on the floor。 She stumbled forward； offbalance； into Carlisle s arms。 He caught and steadied her。 Again； the envy flooded through me。 I was beginning to understand her She didn t
I m fine； she said before he could ment； faint pink in her cheeks。 Of course； that wouldn t bother Carlisle。 dropped his hands。 He made sure she was balanced； and then Take some Tylenol for the pain； he instructed。 It doesn t hurt that bad。 Carlisle smiled as he signed her chart。 lucky。 It sounds like you were extremely Lucky Edward She turned her face slightly； to stare at me with hard eyes。 happened to be standing next to me。 Oh； well； yes； Carlisle agreed quickly； hearing the same thing in her voice that I heard。 She hadn t written her suspicions off as imagination。 Not yet。 All yours； Carlisle thought。 Handle it as you think best。 Neither human heard me。 Thanks so much； I whispered； quick and quiet。 Carlisle s lips turned up a tiny bit at my sarcasm as he turned to Tyler。 I m afraid that you ll have to stay with us just a little bit longer； he said as he began examining the slashes left by the shattered windshield。 Well； I d made the mess； so it was only fair that I had to deal with it。 Bella walked deliberately toward me； not stopping until she was unfortably close。 I remembered how I had hoped； before all the mayhem； that she would approach me This was like a mockery of that wish。 Can I talk to you for a minute？ she hissed at me。 Her warm breath brushed my face and I had to stagger back a step。 Her appeal had not abated one bit。 Every time she was near me； it triggered all my worst； most urgent instincts。 Venom flowed in my mouth and my body yearned to strike to wrench her into my arms and crush her throat to my teeth。 My mind was stronger than my body； but only just。 Your father is waiting for you； I reminded her； my jaw clenched tight。 She glanced toward Carlisle and Tyler。 Tyler was paying us no attention at all； but Carlisle was monitoring my every breath。 Carefully； Edward。 I d like to speak to you alone； if you don t mind； she insisted in a low voice。 I wanted to tell her that I did mind very much； but I knew I would have to do this eventually。 I may as well get on with it。 I was full of so many conflicting emotions as I stalked out of the room； listening to her stumbling footsteps behind me； trying to keep up。 I had a show to put on now。 I knew the role I would play I had the character
down： I would be the villain。 I would lie and ridicule and be cruel。 It went against all my better impulses the human impulses that I d clung to through all these years。 I d never wanted to deserve trust more than in this moment； when I had to destroy all possibility of it。 It made it worse to know that this would be the last memory she would have of me。 This was my farewell scene。 I turned on her。 What do you want？ I asked coldly。 She cringed back slightly from my hostility。 expression that had haunted me Her eyes turned bewildered； the You owe me an explanation； she said in a small voice； her ivory face blanched。 It was very hard to keep my voice harsh。 anything。 I saved your life I don t owe you She flinched it burned like acid to watch my words hurt her。 You promised； she whispered。 Bella； you hit your head； you don t know what you re talking about。 Her chin came up then。 There s nothing wrong with my head。 I met her glare； making my She was angry now； and that made it easier for me。 face more unfriendly。 What do you want from me； Bella？ I want to know the truth。 I want to know why I m lying for you。 What she wanted was only fair it frustrated me to have to deny her。 What do you think happened？ I nearly growled at her。 Her words poured out in a torrent。 All I know is that you weren t anywhere near me Tyler didn t see you； either； so don t tell me I hit my head too hard。 That van was going to crush us both and it didn t； and your hands left dents in the side of it and you left a dent in the other car； and you re not hurt at all and the van should have smashed my legs； but you were holding it up Suddenly； she clenched her teeth together and her eyes were glistening with unshed tears。 I stared at her； my expression derisive； though what I really felt was awe； she had seen everything。 You think I lifted a van off you？ I asked sarcastically。 She answered with one stiff nod。 My voice grew more mocking。 Nobody will believe that； you know。 She made an effort to control her anger。 When she answered me； she spoke each word with slow deliberation。 I m not going to tell anybody。
She meant it I could see that in her eyes。 keep my secret。 Even furious and betrayed； she would Why？ The shock of it ruined my carefully designed expression for half a second； and then I pulled myself together。 Then why does it matter？ I asked； working to keep my voice severe。 It matters to me； she said intensely。 a good reason why I m doing it。 She was asking me to trust her。 line I could not cross。 My voice stayed callous。 I don t like to lie so there d better be But this was a Just as I wanted her to trust me。 Can t you just thank me and get it over with？ Thank you； she said； and then she fumed silently； waiting。 You re not going to let it go； are you？ No。 In that to。 I d could be a horror case I couldn t tell her the truth if I wanted to and I didn t want rather she made up her own story than know what I was； because nothing worse than the truth I was a living nightmare； straight from the pages of novel。 I hope you enjoy disappointment。 We scowled at each other。 It was odd how endearing her anger was。 Like a furious kitten； soft and harmless； and so unaware of her own vulnerability。 She flushed pink and ground her teeth together again。 Why did you even bother？ Her question wasn t one that I was expecting or prepared to answer。 I lost my hold on the role I was playing。 I felt the mask slip from my face； and I told her this one time the truth。 I don t know。 I memorized her face one last time it was still set in lines of anger； the blood not yet faded from her cheeks and then I turned and walked away from her。
4。 Visions I went back to school。 to behave。 This was the right thing to do； the most inconspicuous way By the end of the day； almost all the other students had returned to class； too。 Just Tyler and Bella and a few others who were probably using the accident as a chance to ditch remained absent。 It shouldn t be so hard for me to do the right thing。 But； all afternoon； I was gritting my teeth against the urge that had me yearning ditch； too in order to go find the girl again。 Like a stalker。 An obsessed stalker。 An obsessed vampire stalker。 School today was somehow； impossibly even more boring than it had seemed just a week ago。 alike。 It was as if the color had drained from the bricks； the trees； the sky； the faces around me I stared at the cracks in the walls。 There was another right thing I should be doing that I was not。 Of course； it was also a wrong thing。 It all depended on the perspective from which you viewed it。 From the perspective of a Cullen not just a vampire； but a Cullen； someone who belonged to a family； such a rare state in ou